Do I Drop Out of School? My Hardest Decision and Why I Now Feel at Peace


Sitting the car, trying to be present in the moment in making my hardest decision to date.
There have been many days over the past couple of weeks where I have just sat in the car in complete silence. This has really helped me to process my thoughts and feelings surrounding this major life decision.
View from my morning walk. Helping me to clear my head to make my hardest decision.
I have begun to really cherish my beloved morning walks! I am so grateful that I live in such a beautiful town. These walks have allowed me to really focus on myself to help me make my next right decision, especially surrounding this big life decision that I’ve been pondering for the last few weeks.
My dog Lolly sitting at the table like a person. Really trying to not get too in my head and to enjoy the little moments life has to offer, especially while trying to work through my hardest decision
This was at dinner the other night! Lolly is sitting at the table while we eat our dinner. Definitely not the best idea, but it was super cute in the moment! I’m really learning to not let these big decisions stand in my way and to allow myself to laugh at the little moments that life has to offer.

What a few weeks it has been!! I cannot believe that we are already in the middle of June! I have been working about four days a week, and because of that and the work of my two online classes, I have not had much free time. However, in the last week or so, I have been contemplating one of the hardest life decisions that I have had. On the upside, I now feel at peace with my decision.

Backstory

Almost two weeks ago, one of my co-workers announced to us that she has made the incredibly hard decision to leave her role at the bank. This came as a shock to all of us. It has definitely been a bit of a bittersweet two weeks as we realize her end date is drawing near. We are unbelievable happy for her and excited for her next chapter, however, it is hard at the same time.

In these last few weeks, I have also come to realize how much I truly love my job at the bank. When I first started as a seasonal teller, I never saw myself loving this job as much as I do. As with many things in my life, I saw myself staying at the bank for one summer. However, this is the third time I have returned, and I love it more than ever.

My Hard Decision.

I have never thought about leaving school more than I have in the last two weeks.

This is definitely one of the hardest decisions that I have ever had to make. For the last week, I have deeply contemplated dropping out of college to take that job. I still would want to get my degree. However, I would find a less conventional way. I would try to take night classes or finish the remaining requirements online.

I love the people I work with. For the first time ever I could actually envision myself in that role. This is something that has never happened to me before.

When trying to make this decision, I realized that I still have two more years left of school. I also have an internship lined up for next Spring. And I finally feel like I have found my footing at school, especially with the friend I have made.

If I really wanted to work at the bank full-time, I would find a way to make it work.

Do I stay in school or do I work at a job that I love?

My Decision

With a lot of thought and a lot of contemplation, I have decided to stay in school. I realized that this was the best decision for me in the moment, and I feel at peace with that. I no longer feel as stressed or anxious about this decision as I did last week.

However, if a job opens up at this particular branch in the future, I will definitely give it some thought. This branch and these people will always hold a special place in my heart.

It was my first real job.

It was the first place where I truly felt like I belonged.

It helped me to find my footing.

It showed me that there are truly wonderful people in this world.

It helped me to realize that I have a voice and I matter.

I have created some nice relationships with the people at the bank and I look forward to continue getting to know these amazing people in my remaining weeks, in the hopes of keeping these relationships alive, even when I am back at school.

How I Know I Made the Right Decision

On Thursday or Friday of last week, I was driving home from work and I was incredibly stressed and anxious. I knew I needed to make a decision sooner rather than later. I was going through all of the pros and cons of both decisions about why I should take the job or why I should stay in school. There were lots of pros and cons to both sides.

However, over the weekend, I finally realized that staying in school is the right decision for me at this time. I only have two more years left and then I can consider returning to the bank for a full time position, if that is what I end up wanting to do. Honestly, I don’t think I ever really made the decision on what to do, rather it just came to me. And I realized that I am staying in school. I do know that I made the right decision because I am at peace the fact that I will be returning to school and classes at the end of August.

Endnote

All that to say, I am so incredibly grateful to have had to make this decision in the first place. To be able to decide between staying enrolled at a wonderful college to having the opportunity to work some where I love with awesome people. I know many people do not have that chance in life. So even though this decision added some stress to my life, I am still so thankful to have both of these things in my life.

If you are struggling with a major life decision right now, know that you are not alone. It may seem like an impossible decision right now, but realize that you will make the right decision for you and for your family.

Come find me over on Instagram and tell me some of the hardest decisions you have made and how you have worked through them. This was definitely a first for me and I feel like I have learned a lot in the process. However, like I said, I have immense gratitude towards the people I have worked with for the past year, as well as for having had the chance to make this decision in the first place.

Until next week, friend!

P.S. If you want more content in the meantime, check out some of my previous posts!